Today the schools broke up for half term. Mr So and I have taken the week off just to do some things around the house while our daughters are off doing more exciting things. For me, this would usually signal the start of a week of utter overindulgence in alcohol. I would be drinking some kind of fizz every day and my favourite, Sauvignon Blanc. Often I would start drinking at lunchtime – after all what harm could a glass or two do? I was on holiday. It was fun – wasn’t it?
Last school holidays we were away with some very dear friends. Alcohol is central to our get togethers and this time was no exception. We brought lots of wine and beer with us but after only a couple of nights, we were running low. A quick trip to the local supermarket to pick up more “essential” supplies followed, and another and another and another….you get the picture.
It was on the penultimate day of our holiday that I decided I needed to stop drinking, not just for a day or so but forever. I don’t know exactly what made me decide the time was finally right. It had been a very long time coming. I was tired and miserable and I wanted to go home. I wasn’t having fun any more. Drinking wasn’t fun.
That was eight weeks ago and this holiday is going to be so different. As I write, it is coming up to 6.00pm. Before I would have been on at least my third glass of wine, looking froward to Mr So coming home from work and joining me. Drinking on my own perhaps didn’t look so good but having a drink with him, even if he didn’t really want one poor man, would be different. If he didn’t want a drink he was the weird one right ?
Today I have a glass of elderflower cordial made with sparkling water, crushed mint and ice. I have it in my special glass which is one of a set of six I bought when I cleared out the wine glasses and gave them to charity. The special glasses are fine crystal, each in a different colour. The one I am using right now is pale green. It suits my sophisticated beverage perfectly. Later, if the mood takes me I might move onto another tipple. I am thinking something watermelon based. For that I will use the pink glass.
Now that there is no option to drink, I feel so much calmer. I think there will be times over the next week when I struggle with cravings. For me, the association of alcohol and holidays is very strong. For the moment though, so far, so good.