This staying sober is tough. I am nine weeks dry and today it feels so hard.
I think I have been overdoing it. About 10 days ago I wrote about how pleased I was to be able to offer something back to the sober community without whom I would not have made it this far. Today I feel drained.
I have been trying to support two other ladies struggling towards sobriety – one online and the other in real life. I think I have got too emotionally involved. It is all a bit too close for comfort. A few short weeks ago I was where they are now and I don’t want to go back. I can’t go back.
I feel selfish but I know I need to take a step back and take care of me but I so want to help. I am sad, frustrated, scared and sometimes in despair.
If I was talking to a friend feeling this way I would tell them to take care of themselves first and foremost. Ultimately it is not my responsibility to help those ladies get sober. But it’s hard standing by, looking on.